I really enjoy the process of architecture. I love to think, design, and create, but I sort of dispise the "baggage" that comes with it. That is: not sleeping, not seeing my family and friends, constantly doubting my capabilities, trying to be a library and regurgitating who's who in architecture and what the latest project/technology/conversation/exhibit/etc/etc... are.

So since, school started, which was only a month ago, I've struggled, I've cried, and I've doubted myself numerous times. And I've felt proud and excited a handful of times.

My mentor, my friend, my collegue, my former professor, Daniela saved me. I was so stressed, so depressed, and so STUCK - ready to throw in the towel, but she fixed me. She fixed me in a way that no one could. 

I have many friends and collegues that truly support me, but Daniela is only person that understands my genetic make up, inside out. She knows me so well because we are so much a like - only she has much more experience than I do.

Anyway, long story short, she is the only one in the field who is passionately practicing, that I can share my doubts with. I've shared with her a time before that I didn't think architecture was for me. That was about a year ago and I talked myself out of that... boy was she relieved. But then it surfaced again... this time around - very seriously. She takes it as her own personal agenda to help me because she sees the potential in me. After long discussions, she realized that I was sort of unhappy. I finally admitted to her that I have another love - photography.

It is so hard to admit this to someone in the architecture industry, but she listened and immediately said... "sounds like you know what you need to do - if you haven't done so already."

The final verdict: I still have a love for architecture, and will finish my 9 months of sleep deprivation, but I will leave it with open arms for photography. Depending on what life throws at me, I'll work in the industry until I can really build my photography portfolio. The good news is... for both sides, is that I have this feeling that photography will bring me back to architecture - in a fun, less stressful way. And I definitely think that architecture will give me that extra something that will make photography special.

That was a long post - sorry. I'll post some pictures of my work when I have more time.

Well, there are about 350 television shows about the affluent America, the comfortable America, the viable and cohesive nation where everyone gets what they want if they either work hard or know someone or have a pretty face or cheat like hell. That America is available every night, on every channel in the Comcast package.

For a brief time, there was one television drama about the other America.

The escalating breakdown of urban society across the US | Media | The Guardian.

--

The concept of Two Americas was championed in the recent primaries and Presidential race was pushed very strongly by an adulterer. No, not John McCain, the other "John', Edwards.

The reality of that "other America" and the problems it is facing, were best explored by the television program created by the guy that wrote the article above.  It is interesting reading, particularly the point about how watching some programs builds an image in our heads of what something is.  Because the accuracy of his program, a lot of people across the pond are more familiar with the "other America"....than Americans.

Rule #1 of ballroom dancing: the man leads, the lady follows.

He initiates the dance. He starts the first step. And he escorts her off the floor when the dance is complete. If the gentleman is a bad leader, they will both look bad – off-rhythm – awkward. If the gentleman is a great leader, and the lady a great follower, she will shine. She will blossom. She will be the center of attention. Even though he leads, she will be the one to watch; she will radiate beauty and grace.

Drew taught me how to dance while we were dating. The learning process beautifully matched our courtship. He taught me how to carry myself, head up proudly, frame straight and elegant. He taught me how to trust him as a leader, not anticipating his moves or making demands of what would happen next. Now, when people compliment us on our dancing, I smile and say I don’t know what we’re doing – I simply hold on. Even though I answer tongue-in-cheek, I answer sincerely. Drew taught me how to follow – how to hold on to him as he leads.

This is, in many ways, how our marriage works today. I wasn’t always a willing follower, but learning to follow him was easy. He’s an incredible leader. He’s worth following. Of course we make decisions together, of course we talk through problems and Drew seeks my counsel, but at the end of the day I’m so thankful that he’s responsible for this dance. That he’s leading and I’m following. I can trust him to worry about the next beat. I don’t have to anticipate the next step. I can enjoy the moment as he presents me as radiant.

Ephesians 5:25-27 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.

]]> http://kayroul.wordpress.com/?p=115 Sat, 06 Sep 2008 12:45:38 +0000 kayroul http://kayroul.wordpress.com/?p=115 selama berpuasa kepada rakan2 ku.....semoge mendapat keberkatan dan dilimpahi kurniaan rahmat iLahi=) ]]> http://honiahaka.wordpress.com/?p=12 Fri, 05 Sep 2008 18:36:47 +0000 honiahaka http://honiahaka.wordpress.com/?p=12 Este un joc super chiar daca la inceput ti se v-a parea plictisitor, cand ajungi la un nivel cat de cat mare ca si bitefight de altfel vei vedea cat de interesant e...oricum ...ce pot sa va spun...e foarte greu daca nu ai nici un ajutor ;)

Cateva filme cu se se petrece in acest joc!

Cred ca sunt de ajuns :)) succes!

Acestea sunt titlurile ghidurilor şi conţinutul acestora :

Inceputul - Partea I (click aici)

Sa te cunosti pe tine insuti - Partea a IIa (click aici)

Vanatoarea - Partea a IIIa (click aici)

Locurile de interes - Partea a IVa (click aici)

Serviciile de informare - Partea a Va (click aici)

Succes ! :)

I like this green theme (this theme has a great name by the way)-though, as you've complained oh-so-sweetly, 'there's no longer a photo'. Maybe I'll slip one in the side bar, if it really matters that much and you really need a visual spark while reading my brooding, maudlin aimless wanderings??

I hope to leave something proper for you on Friday night/Saturday morning (usual rambling tales and all).  The following has been on repeat most of the day-this band seems promising...And then its your turn: make me smile-give me a joke or show me something amusing... tell me a story, play me a song...give me something new...

~~Your #13~~

Grounds For Divorce
                                 (By Elbow)

Mondays is for drinking to the seldom seen kid

I've been working on a cocktail called 'Grounds for Divorce'

Polishing a compass that I hold in my sleeve

Down comes him on sticks but then he kicks like a horse

There's a Chinese cigarette case,
And the rest you can keep
And the rest you can keep
And the rest you can keep

There's a hole in my neighborhood down which of late I cannot help but fall
There's a hole in my neighborhood down which of late I cannot help but fall

Mondays is for drinking to the seldom seen kid

There's this whispering of jokers doing flesh by the pound
To a chorus of 'supposes' from the little town whores
There'll be twisted karaoke at the Aniseed lounge
And I'll bring you further roses
But it does you no good
And it does me no good
And it does you no good

There's a hole in my neighborhood down which of late I cannot help but fall
There's a hole in my neighborhood down which of late I cannot help but fall
There's a hole in my neighborhood down which of late I cannot help but fall

Someday we'll be drinking with the seldom seen kid

darklucia13@yahoo.com

It was so warm in the hospital the crunchy water was becoming warm water very quickly. Here's LB trying to get the last of the crunchies out of the cup:

She sure spoils us!  BOL

iubesc melodia asta...

(Oh... Charlie?  Thanks!)

But mostly this blog is about me.  The stupid things I do, the weird things I eat, and the embarrassing things I say, and the hilarity that ensues after I've done something stupid/eaten something weird/said something embarrassing. And that's intentional, on account of the fact that - I know you'll be shocked to hear this - there are lots of people in the world who think blogging is only for political pundits, angsty 13 year old girls, and angsty 13 year old girls who grew up to be angsty 33 year old mommy bloggers who now have nothing better to do with their time than gush about their kids and whine about their malfunctioning Diaper Genies on the Interweb.  

Naturally, being a 23 year old single person who is without angst, kids, or Diaper Genies but who is also a mostly regular blogger, I know this isn't true.  

And you know what else isn't true?  That part up there, where I said I was a 23 year old single person.  I'm still 23, although my birthday is rapidly approaching (I'd like a unicorn and a trip to Tahiti, please thanks) but I am no longer what I would call a single person.

Enter The Mister, stage left.  Or stage right.  He's a Republican, after all, so in the interest of fairness, I'll allow him to enter into my life story on whichever side of the stage he chooses.  Especially because I've been making way too many Jamie Lynn Palin jokes lately, and also alluding to the fact that The Mister might be almost as old as John McCain.  Let's be fair.

Luckily for both of us, The Mister isn't quite 49 years my senior, a la George...I mean John...  But he is enough older than me that doing age math is really, really fun.  For me.  For example, when The Mister graduated from college, I didn't yet have a driver's license.  When The Mister was at his senior prom, I was still in elementary school.  When The Mister gets out of bed in the morning, his back audibly cracks.  And then I audibly laugh, and make jokes about his (nonexistent) artificial hip.  See how fun it can be, dating an older man?  Fun for everyone!

But seriously - it's really fun.  Even more fun than elementary school, driving, or the senior prom, and that's saying something.  Apparently fun is what normal people have in relationships, which is just plain crazy, because I always thought relationships were something you did when you felt like self-mutilation might not be enough of a picnic by itself.  Or something you took part in when you weren't feeling quite as horrible enough about yourself as you possibly could. I thought relationships meant that someone drives 60 miles to see another someone who treats them like crap and rewards their long drive not with a kiss on the cheek, but a noncommittal toss of the head because they were in the middle of playing Guitar Hero and couldn't possibly bother to stop.  I thought that's what it was like.

Luckily for both of us (that's you and me, Internet, because now you won't have to listen to my whining) I was wrong.  Turns out that relationships can actually be more than silence, frustration, and one-sided effort.  They can be more than Guitar Hero and blank stares.  They can be more than all talk and no action. They can be more than I ever hoped for.

Because I hoped for common ground and understanding, and instead I found a common soul with wisdom and intelligence to match.  I needed a sense of humor, and I got someone who makes me laugh until I cry.  I prayed for someone to be nice to me, and I have someone who is considerate, chivalrous, and kind.  

I always wanted someone like this.  And I found him.

So even though he is right leaning, slightly disdainful of both veggie pizza and tequila, and was actually born in an entirely different decade, he is also open minded, thoughtful, hilarious, and he brings to our relationships an entirely different perspective of the world that forces me to think about everything in a new way.  And that's worth all the unicorns in all the land.  

And all the trips to Tahiti, too.

Palin had committed the unpardonable crime of betraying the old dames of feminism.  Somewhere along the line old school feminist, the ones who are the elder politicians and university department heads today decided that in order for woman to truly be equal to men they had to more or less unsex themselves.  They had to be able to have sex on demand - like men (pro-birth control, free-sex) and be able to walk away from parenthood – like men (pro-abortion on demand).  That would get them so far, but to be fully equal they also had to emasculate the men around them - lord forbid a man comment on a woman's appearance or open a door for her.   They also had to "gender normalize" the physical requirements for military, police or firefighters... and even neuter what was left of gender specific usage in the English language.  Some of this has been good, but it also has created a set of beliefs, a creed if you will, that defines "feminist".  Which is one reason why so many woman don't just reject the term, but vilify it. Some older feminist woman are surprised  that younger woman aren't more grateful to them for the barriers they broke down which allow younger woman more opportunity, but to quote Michelle Bernard, "...feminists fought for them to enjoy a certain amount of rights, and they [younger women] do that, and then they hear from another generation, 'well how dare you opt out and stay home to raise your kids? You're a traitor to the feminist movement.' Well if somebody's going to tell you that, why would you want to take that badge on?"    This theme has been discussed for the past few years and more pointedly this election cycle where young woman supporting Obama were seen as not exactly showing sisterly solidarity to Hillary.

The overt sexism from other women just saddens me.  I remember well twenty years ago where being a young woman on campus and pro-life meant you were persona non grata at the woman’s' student union (that hurt btw “sisters”).  If you didn't walk lock step with the pro-abortion dogma you were a trader to your gender no ifs, ands or buts.  I also remember the snide words of a former manager while I was walking out the door of my corporate career to stay home and take care of my new born while my husband, who had been doing the stay at home dad thing, went back to work.  She told me I was “shooting my career in the foot to stay home and take care of a baby” (that hurt too, but it sure made it easier to say goodbye).  Woman who have opted to take the feminist path have no problem vilifying those ungrateful girls who become apostate.

There are woman who actually and honestly believe that woman can't be equal if they can't destroy the products of their own fertility, woman can not be successful if they are burdened with children, especially not unexpected babies, not ones conceived when over 40 and certainly not any child ever with a disability.  Young woman must be able to have sex on demand, and use birth control, and if that "fails" then they need to have mommy quietly whisk them down to Planned Parenthood (a misnamed institution if there ever was one) and "take care of the problem" so the young woman's life isn't "ruined" by that horrific punishment called a baby.   

To the liberal feminist of my mother's generation conservatives were viewed as vile kill-joys.  Conservatives are the people who brand woman harlots, who don't want you to have fun.  They are the ones who want to starve the poor, abandon the sick, kill the criminals and start wars for the sole purpose of having young men die on far away shores.  One reason liberals so strongly object to parental consent laws.  In theory a conservative parent wants to keep their children away from birth control and then beat them senseless and kick them out of the house if they end up pregnant -- but they don't want them to get an abortion. 

Men were the enemy. "A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle" If you got married it had better be an equal partnership where all chores where spilt evenly and he can't hold you back from your education or career.  Best if he isn't too "manly", certainly not into the military, guns, sports... maybe a nice poet.

Palin takes all this thinking by the ears and shakes it loose.  She, by her life, shows that a woman can be powerful, beautiful and fertile.  A baby, even unexpected with special needs can be welcomed and loved and perfect.  That  conservative parents would stand by their daughter when she become yet another statistic of teenage pregnancy just pulls the rug out from the ugly stereotype of the ruthless self-righteous parent motif.  What about her husband?  He is a man's man who helps raise the kids.  She needs him there and he supports her.  They are a partnership of aid to one another, not a couple of folks living together with a "no compete" clause in affect.  This frightens and appalls the old ladies of the bra burning brigade.  If they are not  correct in the idea that a successful woman can only exist within the bounds of their dogma, their dogma just might be wrong all together.  How will they convince young woman to follow in their shriveled, barren footsteps when lovely, fertile Sarah Palin is out there?  Palin is dangerous to that mindset.

But the women I know look at Palin and say "rock on sister."  She becomes almost archetype the more the media and liberal idiots online attack.  Sure, throw mud at her kid: She is Boudicca.   Criticize her mothering: She is Devorah.  Question her relationship with her husband: She is Grogo.  Question her experience or the fact she was a beauty queen: She is Ester.  Women have long been proud and noble creatures.  We are Victoria and Hannah, Zenobia and Cleopatra, Isabella, Antigone, Catherine and a nameless host of mothers, wives, sisters and friends who have carried babies, carried burdens and made history sometimes by leading armies or nations, sometimes in learning and rhetoric and often by rocking the cradle. We don't want to have to become shells void of femininity in order to be considered valuable in society.  

So, I adore Palin.  I love the idea of a pioneer mother as Maggie Gallagher puts it.   This is an older and more noble (at least to me) feminism, one that doesn’t have to unsex woman or chew them up and spit them out for the benefit of the corporate world.  It looks past the women of the 60s and 70s who seemed to not really like being feminine and see women who are simultaneously strong and powerfully and authentically and naturally feminine.   Anyone woman with five kids, who nurses a baby in the governor’s office, hunts, fishes and looks great in heals and a skirted suit has my respect and when she is pro-life my vote as well.  Up until now I was feeling nothing so much ennui over the upcoming election, now I am thrilled.  Palin has engaged me, lured me in and charmed me.  Just call me "fan girl" and pass the McCain/Palin yard signs and bumper stickers my way.

Plus we had some good news at the local children's hospital today too. There's been this little girl there for the longest time and we were all set to go visit with her when the nurses stopped us from going in to her room. Usually that's a bad sign. But the nurses were all grinning and smiling and laughing, "She went home this morning!" HOME!?! That's the best thing we can ever hope to hear for some of these kids! They said she's not 100% yet but who cares about that 1%?? SHE'S HOME!! WOOF!!! She'll be at 100% in no time. :)

August is gone. History. And with it went my least productive craft month. I guess that will teach me not to select something which my heart really wasn't all that into. It is not that I don't enjoy sewing. I do, but only when necessary.

September is supposed to be Crochet or Knitting Month but I wasn't able to line up any classes.  I searched locally and online but came up empty.  There is still a chance I will find someone to teach me. I will continue my search. I purchased some books and probably could teach myself but I am a hands on type of gal. I need to see it with my own eyeballs being done by a human before I catch on. 

So... what will I do for September?  Anything I want.

September is going to be a free for all month. Anything goes. A little bit of this. A little bit of that. Some macrame. Maybe I will embroider something afterall. For sure beadwork and stringing beads. And making peyote leaves. Since learning how to make them in class last month I am hooked.  And I will be using existing craft supplies.  

My No Spend Month for August was a success so I am going to continue it for September. My plan was to spend zero dollars on craft supplies for the entire month of August.  To be creative, use what was on hand and rein in my out of control spending habits.  I have to fess up and tell you I did spend some. A small amount. Just $33.20. For me, that is a gold medal moment. 

I really didn't NEED the supplies I purchased but I had been waiting for a sale.  Getting them half off was too good to pass up. I actually SAVED money.

This should be a fun month. Do check back often to see what I make.

O profesoara tanara, abia iesita de pe bancile scolii dar entuziasta , reuseste sa transforme clasa 203, intr-un coectiv, intr-o familie. Un film de nota 10