I noticed today, people talking about their current state of mind or state of affairs as quite permanent when things are down.  And, the same people speaking about good times as fleeting.  Well everything, thoughts and emotions included, are always flowing.  It is about where we choose to focus.  Isn't it?

Perhaps I have been attracting some negativity about the current state of world financial affairs into my circle lately.  Maybe I need to see that contrast since I have spent little time huddling up to the media stories out there about disaster.  I never knew there were so many ways to say "financial collapse".  

There is another view though. If you choose to see things improving, you move your world in that direction and that world moves towards you.  

I'm in a great state of mind right now.  I am seeing so much more good in the world than bad.  That might make me unpopular in the circle of gloom and doom I stepped into today.  But, it will allow me to step right out of that dirty little puddle of negativity just as easily.

Holding the steering wheel with his right foot and using his left foot for the floor pedals, the man demonstrated his driving skill. The state policeman who administered the test admitted, "He drove very well. He is very capable."

The man with no arms commented, "I don't feel handicapped at all. A handicap is a state of mind!"

Just think how much more could we do as Christians if we did not excuse ourselves on the grounds of being incapable! When we are asked to do something at church, to witness for Christ, or to serve in some other way, how do we answer? "Oh, I can't do that!" If so, we are handicapped by our state of mind..

God tells us, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Then Paul declares, "Therefore I will boast gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."

Even if we have a handicap, God is not limited in what He can do through us. In fact, He often uses us for His glory all the more. As we depend completely on the Lord, He empowers us with His Spirit and enables us to do His will.

When we allow the Holy Spirit to work through us, our efforts will be far more effective than if performed by some highly talented or gifted person who relies on himself and fails to depend on God. The Apostle Paul was brilliant, but his thorn in the flesh brought him down to complete reliance upon the Lord. And this is what made Paul's ministry so fruitful.

Some most outstanding Christians have been greatly used for Christ in spite of personal handicaps. Fanny Crosby was blind; yet her music has stirred hearts through the years.

Has God spoken to you about doing something for Him? Have you resisted, thinking yourself inadequate? Don't handicap yourself! Appropriate Philippians 4:13: "I can do everything through him who gives me strength."

"Oh, Lord, fill me with Your Spirit and use me for Your glory however You wish."

Have I been holding back from something I feel God is asking me to do? Am I willing to rely completely on His strength and to step out in faith?

Gestern habe ich mal wieder über die Maßen geplärrt.

Nein, nicht, weil ich gegen den großen Beschiß am kleinen Mann

in Sachen Bankenrefinanzierung demonstriert hätte. Auch nicht wegen

zu viel „Funkel Raus“ Rufen, sondern weil ich ...... im Studio war.

Damit ist übrigens nicht dieser Ort gemeint, für den du 2 Jahre lang soviel Kohle latzt, dass es auch lässig für  Madonna’s Personal Trainer gelangt hätte, nur, um dein schlechtes sportliches Gewissen zu beruhigen, wo du aber am Ende nur 3x hingehst.Nein, ich hab was aufgenommen, wir haben geprobt, und ich hab mich stimmlich wohl mal wieder etwas übernommen.

Jedenfalls kratzt jetzt der Hals. Ich denke offiziell über eine heiße Milch mit Honig nach. Findste Pussy? – Mir doch egal. Die Scheiße hilft. Außerdem: Solangs noch welchen gibt, her damit. Die Amis habens da in Zukunft wohl etwas schwerer. Nicht nur, weil grade alle Banken pleite gehen, die ganzen faulen Kredite platzen und eine Menge Existenzen in Gefahr sind. Auch nicht, weil sie moralisch zerstört sind wie noch nie. Ich sach nur: Irak, Afghanistan, Iran, Bush, Palin, Rezession. Von dem weltweiten Imageabfall der letzten 8 Jahre wollen wir hier ja gar nicht erst anfangen.

Wenn also mein Hals schon kratzt, weil ich zuviel geplärrt habe, dann ist Amerika’s Hals ungefähr so am Arsch wie Sarah Connor’s. „Zum Glück“ sagst du jetzt. Und – du hast auch Recht soweit. Shit, die Staaten müssen so einen Hals haben, soviele Bienen haben die gar nicht, um soviel Honig zu produzieren, dass ein angemessen größenwahnsinniges Glas heiße Milch mit Honig dabei rauskommt.

Und genau darum geht es heute: Um Bienen. Um Honig. Und alles, was in in der Wabe so im Argen liegt.

Es ist nämlich was faul im Staate Dänemark Bienenstaat.

Im Klartext: In den USA besteht die akute Gefahr, dass die Honigbienen aussterben.

Kein Witz. Nur blöd, dass sie für ca. 30% aller Pflanzenbestäubungen im Land zuständig sind. Selbst der größte Anti-Öko dürfte zusammenkriegen, dass das ziemlich weite Kreise im Ökosystem ziehen könnte. Außerdem muß man ja nicht immer die Klampfe auspacken und mit Dreadlocks, Strickpulli und siffigen Klamotten plus Betroffenheitsmiene für irgendetwas einstehen, bzw. demonstrieren. Es geht auch in latscho. So zum Beispiel.

Bee Boy

oder, so:

HoneyBee Mystery

Da der ganze Mist natürlich Kohle kostet, hat die Kampagne einen Sponsor gefunden, der imho eine schicke Microsite zum Thema ins Netz gestellt hat.

helpthehoneybees.com

Und, weil ich ja nie einfach irgendwas erzähle, ohne irgendwann mit musikalischem Bezug um die Ecke zu kommen, auch diesmal ein musikalisches Special – total on topic, natürlich.

Fangen wir mit einem Classic aus der Golden Era an. Von Black Sheep’s erstem (unfassbar geilem) Album „A Wolf in a Sheeps Clothing“, von ’92, an. Those were the days. Slick Talk deluxe. Und so verdammt wahr. Hier als RMX.

Black Sheep - Strobelite Honey

Und dann noch von einer meiner Lieblingssängerinnen aus den gebeutelten Staaten.

Eine mit Stimme, Flavour, Attitude und Bewusstsein. Manchmal etwas zu afrocentric for a lotta people’s taste, aber –oh well. Erykah ist unfassbar. Hier ein Song aus ihrem letzten Album mit übrigens sehr schickem Video.

Erykah Badu - Honey

Für alle, die weder mit Black Sheep noch mit Erykah was anfangen können, hab ich noch was anderes in der Wundertüte, namens „Dein Lieblingsblog“. Und zwar ein schönes Tierfilmchen. Ein Portrait über den Honigdachs. Nich lachen, sonst kommt er vorbei. Wenn der Typ mal keine Eier wie Wassermelonen hat, weiß ich’s auch nicht. Ist für mich jedenfalls der neue Superheld der Natur. Der Kerl legt sich mit Wölfen, Füchsen und fucking Großkatzen an. Shit, der greift sogar Cobras und Puffottern an, wird gebissen, schläft das wie einen Kater aus, und frisst dann die Cobra fertig. Als wär's nix. Das nenn ich mal Hardcore. Müßt ihr euch geben.

Der härteste Mo’fucker der Wildnis: Der Honigdachs.

Wem das jetzt zu blutrünstig war, und wer jetzt seine Nerven beruhigen muss, schaut sich dann vielleicht dann doch das hier an. Tja, hättet ihr nicht gedacht, dass ihr einen Karel Gott Song auswendig kennt, was?

Biene Maja Intro

So, und ich geh jetzt endlich meine heiße Milch mit Honig trinken.
Muß schließlich auf die kleinste Welttournee aller Zeiten, morgen.

I first heard about this story on another blog I follow - Linda's 'Living the good life' and I've heard it since in the news...the red list of endangered and threatened species.

The red list, produced by IUCN, the International Union for Conservation of Nature and Natural Resources, is a list produced every year that lists threatened species, including animals that are threatened with extinction. These animals are threatened because, well mainly because of us - we take away their habitat. All very depressing really. What can we do? Support organisations like World Wildlife Fund. I also think we need to get real about how we consume, where it comes from etc. Try and act a little more like we want our kids to see the hundreds, if not thousands of animals that are currently threatened with extinction or endangered.

[caption id="attachment_456" align="alignnone" width="200" caption="Buy sustainably challenge"][/caption]

 Thanks to One Green Generation blog for this.

On a happier note I have just found out that the 40 hectares that my sister in law (and husband) owns on the South Coast near Moruya has just been granted 'wildlife refuge' status by NSW Parks and Wildlife Service and the NSW Governor. This means that they can get help with managing their land so that they can protect and preserve the natural wildlife on their property. It's not huge- 40 hectares, but they have built a kit home and use solar power etc and they are making a difference.

the blue:

October is Anxiety and Depression Awareness month. There is lots happening to raise awareness of anxiety and depression and Beyond Blue does some great stuff.  I am currently reading Peter Pan and apart from the movies and abridged children's stories of Peter Pan, I have never read the actual novel. I have only just started, but in the first chapter Mrs Darling first hears about Peter while she is "tidying up her children's minds" which was a "nightly custom of every good mother after her children are asleep to rummage in their minds and put things straight for next morning...when you wake up in the morning, the naughtiness and evil passions with which you went to bed have been folded up small and placed at the bottom of your mind; and on top, beautifully aired, are spread your prettier thoughts, ready for you to put on"

I have never heard anything like that before and don't know whether it's a good idea, or just a little bit sinister! I tidy my mind by walking, talking, relaxation of sorts, yoga, the occasional massage, but I think mostly by being around supportive and loving people. We all help each other.

Anyway I've aired some thoughts- pretty and otherwise!

Kx

Recently, I have been trying to experiment with different painting styles and techniques/tackle many of the things that I have deemed "too frustrating" before. One of the recent "experiments" that I wrote about was selling smaller, more simple paintings on EBay. (See that post here) These smaller paintings only came about after I sold a few larger paintings first that did not go for as much as I would have liked them to.

Anyway, after my first EBay auction I decided to try some abstract painting. I am not an abstract painter by any means, I have always been a realist, however I came to find that these were the kind of paintings that sold on this site so I thought I would give it a shot. As I thought about what I should paint, I remembered back to my college/post college painting classes when teachers told me that the easiest way to paint an abstract painting is to take something from real life and zoom in close on it. So, that's what I did. I decided that a turtle shell would be a great place to start because it has really interesting patterns and shapes. In my head  I pictured this completely different from how it turned out. What I pictured was a beautifully army colored painting with sharp gold and interesting shapes, and what I got was a canvas of muddied yuckiness.

So, I put away the canvas for a while after that and hid it in the closet, too embarrassed to even look at it. I have to admit that I am easily frustrated when things don't go the way that I planned. After about a week though I decided to get away from the idea of "natural colors" and just go crazy with it.

A little better, but still not impressive enough for my liking. After I painted this, all I could think about was that it reminded me of some crazy poster from the 60's....some kind of tie-dyed band art or something. So I thought to myself, what goes good with a tie-dyed band poster some trippy lettering of course!

I was so excited the next day at work thinking about how and what I was going to write. My first thought was "Peace. Joy. Love.", most likely inspired by the thought of 60's art, however a friend of mine pointed out that the phrase what kind of girly in comparison to the more masculine piece of art I had already created. So after searching around for some 60's song lyrics I decided that the phrase "It's Just A State Of Mind" taken from the Beatle's "Rain" song fit perfect.

I would have liked to include the whole line, but this was all that would fit. It still get's the right point across though, that you make what you want out of your life no matter what the circumstances might be...so I was cool with it.

Perhaps more importantly, I am in tune with the fact that simply presenting my "ailments" allows for a cure to arrive.  I'll publish this entry now, but hopefully I'll remember to come back and make more sense of what I have written.

In reference to Paulo Coelho's article, "The Strength of the Warrior" I realize I have fallen into the abyss.  I am startled by phantoms and tormented by loneliness; I am surrounded by darkness.  I must communicate with my master.

Perpetual acute depression.  This is my abyss.  Maybe a medical text would show another name, and maybe it sounds more (or less) sever than it really is, but this abyss of mine is suffocating me.

My master will tell me, "It's not the fall which drowns, but the length of time underwater."

I can allow myself to drown, or I can use all my strength to get out of this situation in which I find myself.

I must use all my strength.  I must develop the will to escape this abyss, and not give up until I have moved well forward.

I can't remember who told me that, but it made an impact.  It reminded me that every time I was angry, sad, or aggravated, I just needed to readjust my thinking.  Get rid of "stinkin' thinkin'".

I think this is one of the reasons I have been able to keep a good attitude during deployments.  While there are times that I am ready to pull my hair out and just give up, I realize that I can't.  So it's either I continue my pity party and remain miserable, or I find a way to get over it and be as happy as I can be.  Sure, life would be easier if my husband was home.  He's not home, so I need to be the best mom I can be for my children and the best woman I can be for me.

Because I have been able to "change my mind" it has made me a better person.  I've made friends because I get out and meet people.  My children and I have fun together.  We cook, play, craft and read together.  We do things to make each other happy. 

And in the end, if we are happy, then my husband and their daddy will be more at ease.  It is one less thing for him to worry about while he is away.  He can not be the best soldier he can be if he has things on his mind that he can not control. 

*Household 6 Hooah is currently waiting on arrival information for her soldier! Any day now!!

I'm not sure if they realize the full implications of getting their way, challenging the 1954 tax law that specifies that non-profit, tax-exempt organizations, which includes churches, may not "participate in, or intervene in . . . any political campaign on behalf of any candidate for public office." Just think -- now our churches will pay taxes on what we give them and we, the members of those righteous flocks, will lose the deduction for charitable donations to that church because, well, those churches will no longer be tax-exempt.

There is a positive side, however. ALL who work for one of these organizations, be it a church itself or an organization that is owned by the church (e.g. church-owned university) will be free to speak our political minds. No longer restricted by the "no political campaigning" restrictions imposed by the tax law, a dean at a church-owned university or a Bishop or someone like the above Rev. Johnson can now become politically involved and become an advocate for a political persuasion. Just think! We can begin having political lobbying by all sorts of religious organizations: Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, Wiccan, etc. You weren't assuming, were you Rev. Johnson, that only evangelical Christians will take advantage of this newfound opportunity to speak openly? Are you positive, Rev. Johnson, that leaders of all churches agree with the 33 of you? Do you really believe that everyone has the same political opinion as you? Or do you think that perhaps there are just as many or more who think that Senator Obama is the answer to prayer for our nation?

I think most religions, Christian or not, teach their believers to help and support each other, have tolerance and compassion for all, leave the ninety and nine to search for the one. I personally believe that I am responsible for my actions, that I am should love others as myself, that my beliefs are my own and that I can be as conservative as I want in my own actions, my own personal standards, but that I do NOT have the right to impose my standards on anyone else. I also believe that goes for everyone else, too.

不過下雨天誰想出門!?
弄得溼答答的很不舒爽

 
好吧這幾天電腦也用到膩了
只好勉為其難的把那一點都不吸引人
一大本厚重的化學原文書
拿出來翻翻看看

寫教授說要寫的例題
還有順便準備一下小考吧

喔天阿
真的很討厭
不懂的英文單字又要一直使用翻譯機
就如學長說的
剛開始看原文書可是要花很多工夫的
慢工粗細活啊!
常常看應該速度就會比較快了吧我想

 
這次颱風不知道有沒有帶來什麼重大災情
聽歐芭樂說他家後面山區那邊坍塌了
還停電耶   網路也不能上
為你默哀三秒鐘
其他人應該都還好吧?
 

 
對了
本來就已經延期到這裡拜一的迎新茶會
又因為颱風的放假沒了
一拖再拖

希望下下禮拜天氣好一點
三天兩夜的迎新活動
可不希望被濫天氣搞砸
謝謝祢

end

And what's our news? Not much- the house should have gone through planning, but no-one is telling us that. We have started looking at rental properties (and forgot that renters got treated appallingly). I could be packing, making lists, organising, but feeling somewhat paralysed by it all. I could do a lot, but I do little. In fact today I've spent about four hours scanning and resizing and saving photos from 1989 and 1990!

[caption id="attachment_402" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="me - Kate, 1990"][/caption]

I have found a temporary home for our piano (as I don't think it will fit in ANY of the houses we have seen!), but we have no home.

What else? - well I've seen a couple of good movies in the last fortnight, Caramel and The Band's visit. I enjoyed them both as they are stories about people. Caramel - a group of women friends in Beirut and The Band's Visit - the story of an Egyptian policeman's band lost in Israel. Stories about people and their (mainly) everyday lives...where they are, what they are doing, how they got there.

Had the yearly bookgroup bash at my place, my book - My mistress's sparrow is dead. I was feeling particularly fragile the night of bookgroup - a careless comment at work had upset me. A lot of us hadn't finished the stories -in fact I'd only read about four stories, which was pretty slack of me, but all of the house *stuff* has been really unsettling and unnerving and just tiring.

"When it comes to love, there are a million theories to explain it. But when it comes to love stories, things are simpler. A love story can never be about full possession. Love stories depend on disappointment, on unequal births and feuding families, on matrimonial boredom and at least one cold heart. Love stories, nearly without exception, give love a bad name . . . . It is perhaps only in reading a love story (or in writing one) that we can simultaneously partake of the ecstasy and agony of being in love without paying a crippling emotional price. I offer this book, then, as a cure for lovesickness and an antidote to adultery. Read these love stories in the safety of your single bed. Let everybody else suffer."—Jeffrey Eugenides, from the introduction to My Mistress's Sparrow Is Dead

In fact it turned out that although we hadn't read the stories we all had plenty to say about love - morality, fidelity, marriage - a whole range of stuff. Melissa, one of the bookgroupies, emailed us all the following Shakespeare sonnet the next day:

Sonnet CXVI
by William  Shakespeare

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments.  Love is not love,
Which alters when it alteration finds,
Or bends with the remover to remove.
Oh, no! it is an ever-fixed mark
That looks on tempests.. and is never shaken.
It is the star to every wandering bark
Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken.
Love is not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks
Within his bending sickle's compass come.
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks,
But bears it out.. even to the edge of doom.
If this be error and upon me proved,
I never writ, nor no man ever loved.

Saw One Man the other evening too. I like Steven Berkoff, but I only really liked the Edgar Allan Poe play 'The Tell-tale heart'. I just couldn't see him as an aging skinhead soccer hooligan type in 'Dog'- and he had the wrong boots on which really bugged me - pull-on boots (like Blundstones- only not) and white socks and it was just so wrong, so wrong in fact that I couldn't/didn't enjoy the Dog that much at all. Anyway- Steven Berkoff was good, but I somehow think instead of paying money to see notable actors- maybe I should look again at local theatre next year instead.

So- I need to finish My mistress's sparrow is dead and I'm reading the Barrytown Trilogy by Paddy Clarke and Peter Pan is the next book for bookgroup- so lots to read. Just need to focus.

The children are on two weeks school holidays now. Isabel is going to Auckland, New Zealand in a few days to spend 10 days with an old friend. She packed her suitcase two days ago- and is currently living out of it - in a huge state of excitement!

Kx

I'm going to start posting playlists for your aural pleasure. Here is the first set of the State of Mind series...not to be confused with SF StateOfMind, which can be found in the blogroll under "my experiences, my thoughts, my words..."

I have more pictures, but i'm too tired to write/post anymore so I leave you with this...

what do you know about that New Kids on the Block though...with Ne-Yo?? nice.

New Kids on the Block feat. Ne-Yo: Single

How can I sleep now If I can not relax my mind and throw away the hurts that jabs my stability. It is a common manifiesto for today, is not it? Since a few months ago I can not sleep by night, a lot of thoughts and ideas about life and death cross over my eyes fixed in the ceiling. I would like to choose one of them at least but it is hard... i know it so well.

Now I am trying to sleep remembering good things, or simply praying to God as I did it when I was younger.God... it is a great theme. I would like to write a lot about it but not now, it is too late and tomorrow I have to work. It is 3 AM and I am still writing here. However it is a consequence of my state of mind. When I am with this energy I try to search help in several ways, however none of them help me like I really need and then came the sad feeling of frustration.

What kind of help I search? It is a good question. There are a lot of answers but all of them are simply empty answers because I search help in people, and now I understand that the real help comes from another source. But only now I understand, what happened before? and what happened with all the things I lived and touched in the past? This site will be a good way to recover and face everything that it was back. Some of them were forgotten but they remain latent, another ones results effective but without a a sincere analysis. Here we are.

LE: da, iar am schimbat theme-ul, nimic nu ma multumeste astazi. Header-ul il schimb cand ajung acasa. Vreau domeniu propriu, cu theme propriu.

He's not the only guy (or gal) I've encountered who keeps his feelings to himself. Frankly, I just don't understand that. Then again, I'm at the point in my life where I don't like to waste time with small talk; I like to make deep connections with people and establish emotionally intimate relationships right off the bat.

I understand that people who have been hurt or traumatized guard against opening up to others for fear of being hurt again. I find that incredibly sad. Energetically speaking, they are dooming themselves to a vicious cycle of fearing and expecting—and hence unconsciously manifesting—the worst from people.

After all, the state of your reality is a reflection of your state of mind, which is determined by the quality of your thoughts. If you do not control your thoughts, they will control you.

You may believe that the world is menacing and chaotic, that no one can be trusted, that life is an endless series of bad breaks and hard knocks. After all, rare is the person who has not been bullied at school, fired from a job, or felt rejected and even humiliated by a member of the opposite sex.

Or, you may trust that the universe is benevolent and orderly, that most people are compassionate and good-hearted, that every day offers countless opportunities to celebrate life and extend kindness to others.

Each of these outlooks will attract the people, situations, and events that reinforce the worldview of the person doing the attracting. What’s more each occurrence will strengthen that person’s beliefs, thereby attracting even more “proof” that the way they perceive the world is the way the world actually is.

Their core beliefs will always be perpetuated because people tend to “see” only what they believe or what they can make sense of. Indeed, when two people with opposing viewpoints witness the same event, they will interpret it in opposite ways to make it fit their preconceived notions.

Who you are and how you see the world determine what you attract. Maintain a loving, positive attitude, and you will act as a magnet to draw loving, positive people and experiences into your life.

The same principle applies to negative mindsets. Throw mental daggers at your boss and you will continue to be the target of his fault-finding missions, never imagining for a moment that you are contributing mightily to your own misery.

This universal law is at work in your own life whether or not you are conscious of it. Every thought, every choice, has consequences. Ultimately, the only thing standing between you and a brighter future is your very next thought.

A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person
lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror.
                                               Ken Keyes, Jr.

So I try to get a mindset of just going out, having a few drinks and sitting down in a corner with people I know and just people watching.  Then again isnt there the state of mind to . Yeeaaahh party, visualise getting laid or whatever.  Does that sort of state of mind work?  Its happened enough to me inthe past to be carefull what you wish for as knowing me itlll only come out bad.

Prediction for the night
80% chance of sitting there bored, bumping into the ex ex who will then either go down the ignore me route or the route of massive shows of affection for her fella (who cares).  SW will bump into some st davids mates, do shots, get paranoid at SP turn into a headcase and then it being award for a while.  On the side of this GD and his misses will be out so it its 2 couples ill make my excuses and limp back so solva

20% chance of not just ending up in the one pub like always and going out and about to see some different things

100% chance my hair will look crap like normal

<2% chance i run into that lass who gave me her number from the other weekend and thinking of it bumping into NO who is also out with her new fella. Its been a record year for couples getting together..

I have a new twitter page that I will try to update as the night goes along, always funny to see drunk ramblings http://twitter.com/mwnn

Oh for anyone whos made comments on the blog, i will reply shortly. Some people have had kind words to say!